Heteroflexible

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"Heteroflexible" is a song by LorD and Master based on a fictional narrative that Dan read somewhere, possibly in a "Dear Deidre" section of a tabloid newspaper, about a man whose best friend, a woman, is seeing a guy who's two-timing her with at least the male best friend and possibly others.

Lyrics

I really don't think it's what you think 
The lipstick on his collar may be pink 
But once he's had something to drink 
The world turns upside-down 

You're trying to square the circle 
Will this never end 
Why can't you see what's plain to me 
He'll never be more than a friend 

We've heard the rumours 
Can they be true 
We've all heard it's not just girls 
And he's not just seeing you 
Heteroflexible or bisexual 
Whatever it may be 
I've found out he's seeing you 
Now I'm saying he's seeing me 

Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 

He played the field, he played us all 
I can't believe he had the gall 
To hang up when I made the call 
We're gonna turn him upside-down 

We never said it's exclusive 
So I can't be too mad 
But you're the one he told whose 
Heart he's glad he had 

We've heard the rumours 
Can they be true 
We've all heard it's not just girls 
And he's not just seeing you 
Heteroflexible or bisexual 
Whatever it may be 
I've found out he's seeing you 
Now I'm saying he's seeing me 

Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 

Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 

Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 

We've heard the rumours 
Can they be true 
We've all heard it's not just girls 
And he's not just seeing you 
Heteroflexible or bisexual 
Whatever it may be 
I've found out he's seeing you 
Now I'm saying he's seeing me 

Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 
Heteroflexible 

Heteroflexible

Versions

Personnel

  • Written, produced and performed by Daniel Bailey-Graham.